Notice to all born again

Written by

in

Notice to all born again patriots: The United States Code : Title 4, Chapter 1 carefully details the manner, disposition, location, rules and convention used to display the american flag.

Since this sudden wave of patriotism has passed over us, I’ve seen about 6 examples in the last week of improper flag display. Friday, for example, a local grocery store positioned a flag in it’s window with scotch tape. Of course, the top two pieces of tape had let go and the flag was being displayed upside down. Not to mention that the flag had originally been positioned so that it was facing rightward to the store, but to the rest of the world, it was backward. I also saw another store yesterday with a flag similarly displayed in the window facing the wrong way. I’ve seen flags being flown on masts with corporate flags flown at the same height.

If you are going to be overcome by patriotism, fine, wonderful, have a great time. But, do take the time to learn a little bit about what you are doing. You simply cannot make up these things as you go along. For your superpatriots that don’t have time to read due to your busy schedule of patriotic exhaltation, here are some basic guidelines:

1. When displayed either horizontally or vertically against a wall, the union should be uppermost and to the flag’s own right, that is, to the observer’s left. When displayed in a window, the flag should be displayed in the same way, with the union or blue field to the left of the observer in the street. this means stop putting it in windows the wrong way

2. No other flag or pennant should be placed above or, if on the same level, to the right of the flag of the United States of America. This includes international flags, state flags, POW/MIA flags, and your stupid redwings/UofM flag.

3. Half-Staff – The flag, when flown at half-staff, should be first hoisted to the peak for an instant and then lowered to the half-staff position. The flag should be again raised to the peak before it is lowered for the day. Only by the order of the president of the United States, may the U.S. flag to be flown at half mast. This means when the flag at the capitol goes up, your should too

4. You flag cannot be flown at night unless it is permanently lit. Take it down at night, or get a floodlight on it

5. The flag should never be displayed with the union down, except as a signal of dire distress in instances of extreme danger to life or property. So don’t even think about it

6. The flag should never touch anything beneath it, such as the ground, the floor, water, or merchandise.

7. The flag should never be carried flat or horizontally, but always aloft and free.

8. The flag should never be used as wearing apparel, bedding, or drapery. It should never be festooned, drawn back, nor up, in folds, but always allowed to fall free.

9. The flag should never be fastened, displayed, used, or stored in such a manner as to permit it to be easily torn, soiled, or damaged in any way. So get it off your car, there are rules about that too

10. The flag should never be used as a covering for a floor, wall, or ceiling.

11. The flag should never have placed upon it, nor on any part of it, nor attached to it any mark, insignia, letter, word, figure, design, picture, or drawing of any nature.

12. The flag should never be used as a receptacle for receiving, holding, carrying, or delivering anything.

13. The flag should never be used for advertising purposes in any manner whatsoever. Period. This is the most commonly broken rule

This has been another paxtonland service bulletin to the clueless.